


Just My Luck

by MaxandMatthew24



Series: Love Live! ABDL Adventures!! [9]
Category: Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: ABDL, Age Play, Diapers, F/F, Implied Suicide Attempt, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Little!ruby, Masturbation, Mental Health Issues, Mental Hospital, POV First Person, Sexual Content, Wetting, little!maru, messing, mommy!yohane, referenced mommy!you and little!chika
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-12-09 15:20:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20996972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaxandMatthew24/pseuds/MaxandMatthew24
Summary: Yohane is struggling with her mental health and nearly ended it all. After being discharged from the hospital, she tries to cope with it all to her girlfriends Hanamaru and Ruby.





	Just My Luck

**Author's Note:**

> This story is very personal to me. I’m honestly a little scared sharing this but I’ve decided I’m ready. This was my mental health journey told by a character I feel a strong connection to. It’s everything except the part of me being a trans man. This is my longest one shot so far I just realized.

I woke up in my dark hospital room. I got up from my bed and grabbed my watch since this was the only way I can figure out the time. It was 6:45 in the morning and it was raining outside. Just my luck, I wanted to get fresh air today. To make things worse, I can’t leave my room yet. Not until 7. It’s been almost a week since I’ve been incarcerated to the hospital. No one knows for sure when I’m getting out of here but I can’t wait. This was my second stay in the psych ward. 

I’ve had horrible anxiety my whole life. Starting when I was 5, I was getting anxious around food and won’t eat more than a meal a day. I wouldn’t even call it a meal, it was more like a snack. So I’ve been to the hospital plenty of times because I wasn't eating. Almost got taken away from my family. Only because the hospital got the police involved thinking I wasn’t being fed. Bullshit system. Then my anxiety kept getting worse with time. Eventually, it came to I would have almost daily panic attacks so my mom took me to therapy and a psychiatrist. Got meds and everything got better right? You are mistaken, my friend. 

When I was in my last year of middle school, I had thoughts of hurting people and wanting to end my life. I had no friends at the time since everyone thought I was a freak because I act as a fallen angel all the time. So I only had my mom for support and went to the hospital. After what felt like an eternity, I was discharged and was diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and bipolar. I was able to understand the first two but not bipolar. My mom doesn’t agree with that diagnosis either but I still was forced to take the meds for bipolar. 

My mom thought it would be a good idea to transfer me to a new school and start fresh for high school. Just my luck, I meet my kindergarten friend, Hanamaru, for the first time since then. She honestly looked so pretty and I pretty much fell in love. And her friend Ruby, I kinda fell for them both. Soon enough I ended up joining the school idol club with the two. From this, we got so much closer and eventually falling in love with each other. 

By this point in my mental health, I have been getting worst. So what does a normal teenage do? Look around on the internet to find something. And I just so happened to find porn. How fun. I was instantly drawn to BDSM and the lifestyles people have. I always thought of myself as a dominant but I think I’m really a switch. Since Hanamaru, Ruby, and I are going out now, I low key try to bring up just sex in general. We kiss yes but, I want to do more. I’m a horny teenager leave me alone. 

Since being a school idol, I honestly enjoy it but it’s so stressful and having to balance school wasn’t helping. Since the schools I have been in the past are horrible, my reading level is that of an elementary student and I’m used to everything being laid out for me. So you can imagine high school is difficult for me. Growing up I was placed with the kids who have trouble learning or have learning disabilities, I don’t have either. My mom only requested for extended time on tests and they still fuck that up. So school is rough. 

Zuramaru and Ruby have been great to me. They are patient with me, they listen to me, and they help me try to break my habit. I still can’t stop but they try to give it their all to try. 

I’ve been thinking about this the whole time hoping time will go by faster. And I look at the time to see that I’m allowed to leave my room. I got to the common area and wait for everyone to come out. I’m acquainted with most but recently I’ve heard some of the other girls talking about me and a small group of us. I thought this was supposed to be a safe and bully free space but I guess not. 

Once everyone was up and done vitals, breakfast came out and it was the same thing we ate yesterday. It’s not great but it’s not the worst thing in the world. I’m hoping more or less that I don’t see the assigned psychologist since they might change me to someone else again and I have to tell my story again ugh. 

And what do you know, that’s what happens. 

“Tsushima-san?” I look up to see a doctor approach me, unsure if it’s that was me. 

“Yes?” 

“Hello, I’m -insert doctor name here-, can we talk?” I honestly could care less about what the doctor’s name was. They were probably going to change my doctor again. 

“Sure.” I threw away my plate and followed him to a quieter area. Here we go again. 

“So what brings you here, Tsushima-san? I would like to know everything that led up to this.” Of course you do. 

I sigh. “Well I was coming home from a family get together dinner thing and I was getting really suicidal in my thoughts. I was here a week before being imitated here from wanting to hurt and rape someone but they thought I was safe to go home. I made a list of reasons to end it all in my head. The reasons being that I have an extremely hard time keeping friends, I don’t want to take medication anymore, I didn’t feel I could get better, I hated that I have thoughts of hurting and or raping people, and I selfishly didn’t care about others' feelings and was ready to do it that night. Unknowing to me, my girlfriends showed up to my house unannounced while I was holding the knife over my neck. They informed my mom who called an ambulance to take me here.” 

The whole time the fucker was just nodding his head like are you a fucking bobble head? And if he wasn’t being a bobble head, he wrote shit down. It’s good in my mind I guess because he was activity trying to figure out what the fuck was wrong with me. Then he starts asking my level of emotion which I’ve done before the last time and it does help. But I don’t want to talk about this anymore, I just want to be with my girlfriends and my mom. I can only see them for 2 hours a day and 4 hours on weekends. So I really miss them and I tend to keep to myself and I have no roommate so I’m basically alone. 

“We have discussed medication better suited for you and we want to try -x- for -x-ml. You’ll speak to the therapist a little later.” With that, he lets me go back to the group. Also not telling me what the medication is used for. Is that legal? Not too long later, the therapist comes to get me. At least he got me out of class. School in the hospital was at base level education since it has middle schoolers to high schoolers here. So it was pretty boring. He took me a few feet away from the classrooms next to one of the bedrooms. He has papers outside his notebook and folder so this better be good. 

“Tsushima-san, how have you been? I can’t help but notice that you look really tired.” Finally, someone who doesn’t see me as a paycheck. 

“I can’t sleep at night. Ever since the nurses stopped giving me -x- I haven’t been able to sleep. I think my body got too used to the medication and relies on it for me to sleep. At least they are nice enough to still give me -x- even though I can’t swallow pills and one nurse made me swallow one. It was the worst experience ever and the first thing I told the nurse when I got here was that I can’t swallow pills.” 

“I’m sorry to hear that. I’ll talk to the nurses about this.” He didn’t. “I’ve talked to the doctors and we came to a conclusion of what you have. Here,” He hands me a piece of paper. “We believe you OCD, not bipolar.” 

“That explains a lot.” He continues to explain the treatment right for me moving forward. Soon he lets me back with the group. Now I really can’t wait to leave. 

Finally it was nighttime so it’s visiting hours and I’m not sure who’s coming today. I know Zuramaru and Ruby try their hardest to visit me but my mom can’t come here everyday. It’s an hour ride here from home so she doesn’t have the time to everyday. So I just paist around my room and wait and see if anyone comes. It gets really lonely here. More here than in my own room. At least in my room I have posters on my wall that I feel like they can see me but I can’t communicate with them. 

“Tsushima-san, you have visitors.” The caregiver informed me as I look like a crazy person in my room. Oh wait, I am a crazy person. I practically ran out of my room to see Zuramaru and Ruby sitting at one of the dinning tables. They gave me a gentle and loving smile. I bet I look like a mess. I calm down my movement over to my girlfriends and slouched down in my seat. 

“How are you today Yoshiko-chan? We brought you food today, zura.” Maru asked going into a bag for the food. 

“Well I found out that they wrongly diagnosed me with bipolar the last time I was here. I actually have OCD. What’s next? They tell me I have autism? As if people don’t make fun of me saying that I have it. To make things worse, I would believe too. And now I’m really tired since I can’t sleep at night.” I complained but they were willing to listen to everything. Zuramaru got out food for me and luckily it’s still hot. “I’m guessing my mom didn’t come today?” 

“No I’m sorry, but she did pack things for you. Do you want us to take your laundry or wait until tomorrow, zura?” I prefer to have my mom to do my laundry since I don’t trust myself to do that. She doesn’t mind it which I’m thankful for. 

“Take it tomorrow. What did my mom leave for me?” I started eating my food, well, mostly picking at it.

“More clothing, that extra blanket you wanted, a new manga book and,” Ruby went into the bag and pulled out a cuddle size stuffed shark. “This guy here.” 

My eyes lit up. “They are letting me have him?! I thought he was too big for me to have! Aww sweet!” I took him from Ruby. 

“You have a name for him?” Ruby asked. 

“Not yet, I’m waiting for the right name to come to me.” We continued to talk and play games with the short time we have. Soon enough it was time for them to leave. While the caregivers and nurses weren’t looking, I gave them both a kiss and a hug. Once they were gone, I was back to being alone in my room. Since I’m sad horny teenager, I jerked off in the shower. It not ready a big deal, no one comes in and I’m completely quiet. 

It’s been 13 days since I’ve been the hospital. Thank God I’m out. And the next day just so happened to be Valentine’s Day. My friends didn’t know I was going to go back to school the next day from me being discharged. They told me they wanted to have a welcome back party for me but there was no way they were going to be able to manage it. Nonetheless, they were happy to see me.

Zuramaru and Ruby went over to my apartment after school to celebrate the day. Well, yes, they did but my mom doesn’t want me to go anywhere by myself for the time being. My mom was working late today so it was just the three of us for the next few hours. We made dinner together and baked a small cake. We were having a fun time together. 

With all our food eaten and homework done, we got time to sit on the couch and watch a movie. We were lightly flirting to each other. I kinda got into the mood and I placed my hand on each of their thighs. I was in the middle so it was easy for me to do that. I looked over at both of them and saw their faces turning red. They were resting on my shoulders and they looked up at me. They eyed my lips and leaned in. 

We have had make out sessions before but I want to go farther. Ruby looked more eager to kiss me so I wanted to tease her. I gave her a small kiss on the side of her lip and started kissing Zuramaru. When she needed air, I turned to Ruby. I used my thumb to open her mouth and I started to kiss her and slipped my tongue in. She started to tug on my shirt, trying to pull me on top of her. 

I pulled away. “Ruby?” Zuramaru started touching me from behind. “N-no.” I moved her hands from my stomach. “Not my stomach… I’m fine with this but don’t touch my stomach.” I get uncomfortable when someone touches my stomach. I don’t know why I just do.

“I’m sorry Yoshiko-chan… I thought you would like this, zura…” Zuramaru moved away. I turn over to her and kissed her. 

“I told you I’m fine with this just not my stomach… Do you two want to go farther than this? Do you two want to try?” Ruby and Zuramaru looked at each other. 

“W-we want to do this for you. We know you like sexual things and want to do them with us. We want to try your desires.” Ruby spoke up. 

I raised my eyebrow. “...You want to try my desires? You sure about that?” 

“Well what do you want to do, zura?” 

“I want to tie up one of you and have you dangling in the air. Then the other one will be tied on the bed and have both of you have vibrating dildos inside you. Begging for my touch.” 

They blinked in unison and said “No.” 

“Ok then, how about you two being adult babies? Like I play as your mommy and you act like babies. If you are comfortable with it, I can put you in diapers and dress you two up like babies.” They stared at me in confusion. “Ugh ok lets go to my room.” 

I dragged them into my room. I got into one of drawers and dig around for something. “Here I have adult sized baby clothes.” 

“...How do you have these? In our size no less, zura?” 

“T-that doesn’t matter! Do want to try it or not? I don’t need an answer right now.” They looked at each other and smiled at each other. 

“We’ll think about it and we’ll let you know.” I felt a little happier then they had agreed to each other to think about it. Even if they haven’t agreed to it, the fact they will consider was so happy. 

“Alright, thanks, I love you both.” I gave them a hug and kiss. “But umm, can we still do it today? I really want to if we can…” 

They got closer to me. “Of course, zura. Anything for you.” I turned to Ruby and started kissing her with my heart’s content. While I’m doing that, I let my hands run roam both of the girls bodies. Zuramaru was feeling up Ruby and I can tell she getting turned on by the touches. We move to my bed and I get the two of them sitting on the bed. I move over to Zuramaru and kiss her. 

She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me closer to her. I move my hands around her torso and feel around her nice curvy body. When she pulled away for a breath, I looked over and saw Ruby in only her underwear. I moved so I can look at both of them. Guess Zuramaru took it has her que to take off her clothes too. 

They looked at me with innocent expressions on their faces. Man, they are the cutest things ever. “Who do want to do first, Yoshiko-chan?” Ruby asked me. I couldn’t help but notice the lust in her eyes. The two of them had their legs spread and I couldn’t help but notice the wet marks on their underwear. 

“Both at the same time.” They were taken aback by my comment, I could tell from the surprised looks on their faces. I lean in closer so they would lay down on the bed and touched their breasts. I can’t pick one to do at once, I feel like they will think I like one more than the other. I can tell they like my touch from their breaths get heavier. 

They looked at each other and started making out with each other. I took the opportunity to move my hands down to their underwear. I go to their clits and moved my fingers in circles over the fabric. I do this for a little bit getting more rough as the seconds pass. I noticed the wet spots on their underwear getting bigger so I take it as I'm doing a good job. 

“Please… Yoshiko-chan… Inside! I want it inside, zura!” 

“Ruby too… Ruby wants it!” 

They stopped me for a second so they could take off their underwear. They spread out their legs and I got full view of their area. Man was it hot. I was clearly able to see how turned on they were. I teasingly moved my fingers through the folds. I raised my fingers and showed the wetness on my fingers. 

“Did I turn you two on this much? Look how lewd you two are acting! I’ve never seen such expressions from the two of you! Say you want me to fuck you. Say exactly how you want to be fucked. Front? Behind? Positioned like this?” I just wanted to see how desperate they are. 

“Just fuck me already! Fuck me with your fingers inside me!” Ruby pleaded. Honestly I would be lying if that didn’t turn me on a lot. I looked over at Zuramaru. 

“How about you Ha-na-ma-ru~?” I thought her face can’t get anymore red. 

“F-fuck me Yoshiko-chan! Pound me with your fingers!” 

“That’s all I needed.” With that, I inserted my fingers inside them at the same time. It wasn’t hard to get them in. I started off with one finger in each but I quickly realized that it wasn’t enough. With two inserted, they moaned their heads off. They touched each other’s breasts and kissed each other. 

“I-I’m gonna-!” 

“Me too, zura!” 

They cried out as they climaxed. Once they were done riding down from their highs, I took out my fingers and licked each of them. They tasted sweet. They didn’t really noticed but I wanted them to clean off my fingers so I only took a small lick. As they are trying to bring down their heavy breathing, I shoved my fingers into their mouths. They look the hint and cleaned off my fingers. 

They looked like they were sucking dick, taking it in their mouths and licking it in a really erratic way. This is why I want a dick, just so I can see them sucking me. Once it was deemed clean, I moved my fingers away. Zuramaru pulled me into a kiss and Ruby followed suit. 

“Can we return the favor? We want to make you feel good too.” I shook my head. 

“Nah I’m good, just watching and doing it to you two was enough for me. Besides, my mom should be home soon. She did offer a ride to get you guys home. Unless you want to stay over, I don’t mind.” 

“I can stay over, what about you Ruby-chan?” 

“I can, I just got to let onee-chan know.” 

“That settles that then, how about a bath and head to bed? It’s getting a little late, don't you think? And no one suggest all go in together. No matter what we try, that one person bath is not fitting all of us.” I’m getting war flashbacks from when we tried to make it work, it doesn’t. It was a really small bathroom, two of us couldn’t fit in there without being crushed. 

Once all of us are done with our baths, we climbed into my bed. I go next to the wall, Ruby is in the middle tonight and Zuramaru is at the other end. I make them rotate every time we cuddle in bed. I don’t really know why I make them do that other than me just being paranoid but who cares right? 

But tonight, I want to do something I’ve never done in front of another person. I wanted to sleep with my pacifier. Like I said earlier, I’m more of a switch and when I’m submissive, I like to be a puppy. I know puppy don’t have pacifiers but that’s what gets me in the headspace leave me alone. We haven’t turned off the lights yet since we normally chat before bed and plus, Zuramaru wanted a drink before bed. 

My pacifier bag was in my reach since I left the smaller pouch under my pillow. I can get it without them knowing but they are going to notice it in my mouth. So I’m just having an internal struggle whether I really want it or not. And I really fucking want it, it’s one of those days. The two were chatting about something idol related and I just let out the biggest sigh ever. I didn’t want it to be that loud but here we are. 

“Yoshiko-chan? Are we boring you?” Ruby turned over to me and the pain look in her eyes pained me. 

“No! You never bore me! It’s just… I-I want to sleep with my… pacifier…” Why am I the most awkward fucking being ever? For some reason it embarrasses me that I want my pacifier. I just realized I never call it a binky. Zuramaru just tilted her head. 

“You have pacifiers too, zura? What else do you have?” I sat up on the bed and try to remember what I have. 

“I have onesies, bibs, bottles, pacifiers… diapers- you know just the small things!” I honestly don’t know why I’m trying to avoid the fact I have diapers. I haven’t used any of them so the package is still closed. I was kinda hoping one time they will let me play as their mommy. 

“Oh ok. Do you need to get up to get the pacifier, zura?” 

“No, it’s under my pillow.” Ruby lifted her head since she’s the one mostly using it. I don’t really sleep with a pillow so I let her and Zuramaru sleep on it when they stay over. I got under and took out a pouch. “Want to pick out one from this pile? Or from them all?” 

“You have more? How many do you have?” I shrug. 

“I didn’t count how many, I’m thinking maybe 15? Only 5 are adult sized and the rest are meant for actual babies. I think it’s less but I could be wrong. I only keep 3 under my pillow. The rest are in my dresser under clothes so my mom doesn’t find them.” I took out the pacifiers I had on the cover. “These ones aren’t the exciting looking ones but I grew attached to theses ones.” 

They looked at them. They are more or less trying to convince the other for their choice. Zuramaru wanted the adult sized black one and Ruby wanted the baby one with blue elephants. 

“But won’t Yoshiko-chan look cuter with this one?” Ruby looked like she wanted it more than she wanted me to have it. She keeps eyeing the sucker part and has it close to her face. Pretty much not looking at the print on it. So argument invalid in my eyes. 

“But this one would be more comfortable to suck on, zura!” She has a point I must admit. “What do you want Yoshiko-chan?” Aw fuck. 

“Well from what I was able to notice, Ruby really wants to suck on it and Zuramaru is right about that one being more comfortable.” I never realized Ruby can blush so much in a second. “How about the three of us try one? I mean you two can try it, I obviously try one before. How about it?” I took the other pacifier. 

Zuramaru just looked at it with a blank expression. She blinked a few times then put it in her mouth. Ruby saw her do it and followed her. Their eyes widen so much as they happily sucked on it. I think Zuramaru likes it more. Then I heard footsteps going towards my room. 

“Take it out take it out!” I quickly and quietly whispered. They heard the footsteps too and got it out of their mouths and hid it under the cover. My mom knocked on the room. 

“Can I come in?” At least she respects my privacy. 

“Yeah!” She opens the door to see us sitting on my bed. She walks up to the bed and sits on the corner of the bed. She smiles at us. 

“I was expecting to come home to see the aftermath of a fun night but all I saw was just the TV left on! You three didn’t need to clean up everything, I expecting just your dishes to be cleaned. I hope you three had fun today.” 

“We had lots of fun Tsushima-san! We didn’t want to worry you with the cleaning so we did it ourselves so you can relax. It’s the least we can do to help out.” 

“I’m glad you three had fun. I’ll let you girls be. Would you like more water Hanamaru?” My mom pointed to the water glass Zuramaru had in her hand. 

“No thank you, zura. We were about to go to sleep.” 

“Ok, I’ll take the cup with me.” Zuramaru handed the cup to my mom and my mom walked to the door. “Good night girls, remember I leave for work before you wake up for school so make sure you wake up on time!” 

“I know mom, good night.” She gave us one last smile before turning off the lights and closing the door. I took out my phone and turned on the flashlight. Almost instantly we got the pacifiers in our mouths. 

“Are you ok Yoshiko-chan?” 

“Yeah, why?” 

“You’re moving your feet and leg a lot, zura.” 

“Huh?” I didn’t even notice it, I guess I’m just I’m used to it. For some reason I move my feet a lot when I’m laying down. Like I just move it side to side. But the part about my moving my leg a lot is another story. Normally that means I’m really fucking horny and I want to get off. They know this. 

“You sure you don’t want us to pleasure you? Are you uncomfortable with us doing it to you?” I hate to admit it but I really don’t like showing off my full naked body. I’m fine with showing one half of my body but not the other half. 

“I mean, I wouldn't be opposed to it, I would love it to be honest. It’s just, I’m uncomfortable with showing off my naked body. Not only that but I like to finish as fast as possible. My record is actually 10 seconds. But I wouldn’t mind if you two watched me get off…” 

“You sure? We respect that you don’t want to get naked but we can pleasure you, zura.” 

“I’m sure and plus, I can’t finish from anything else besides my hand. You two can sit beside me against the wall.” 

“What about your mom? Won’t she hear?” 

“Trust me, I know what I’m doing. If I do it right now, nothing is going to happen.” We moved over to the wall. Zuramaru sat to my left and Ruby on the right. We only had the phone light so it took a little bit to get ourselves comfortable. I slid down my pants and underwear. I can feel their eyes looking at me but it oddly turned me on. I opened my legs and I can already tell that I’m really horny without even touching myself yet. 

Ruby took out the pacifier in her mouth and started to kiss my neck and Zuramaru followed. I slid down inside to feel how wet was. I lubed up two fingers with my wetness and rubbed myself off. I was at a comfortable speed for 2 seconds then I sped the fuck up. I think I surprised them to be honest, I was using all my might to get off in seconds. But think they’re more surprised that my breathing was still regular and I had no expression on my face. When I felt that was about to cum, my breathing got more irregular but I still was able to control it. 

Zuramaru rubbed my thigh and Ruby continued to kiss my neck. I kept going with all I had in me. My arm was sore but I keep going. I kept it up for all long as I could. I don’t cum until I can’t hold back anymore and I really couldn’t hold back anymore. When I cum, my whole body tensed up and I relaxed when I finished. I licked off the mess on my fingers. But instead of just putting back on my underwear and pants, I thought I’ll have a little fun. 

“Who wants to lick me clean?” I’ve never seen them doing rock paper scissors so quickly in my life. Ruby was the winner after 5 ties. Ruby got down on me and spread my lower part. “Only enough to clean me up, nothing else.” Ruby nodded. She took out her tongue and was eating me out. I turned to Zuramaru and kissed her. After a minute, I pushed Ruby’s head away. 

“That’s enough, good job. We need to get to bed.” She took one last lick before going over to Zuramaru and started kissing her. I can see her trying to put some of my wetness into Zuramaru’s mouth. As much as I wanted to continue watching that, I don’t want to get turned on again. I got my underwear and pants on and moved to my side of the bed. I got my pacifier back in my mouth and waited for the two to lay down with me. 

After a short time, they moved to their spots in the bed. I got my phone and noticed it’s only been about 4 minutes. They got their pacifiers into their mouths and we cuddled together. It looked like they knocked out instantly. I oddly couldn’t sleep as quickly as them. But, I kinda liked that. I got to look at their cute faces with the pacifiers in their mouths. Well as much as I was able to see in the dark room. 

The next morning, we got up at a reasonable time and prepared to go to school. Nothing eventful happened on the way to school or just at school in general. But my ass had to have a meeting with my teachers, Dia, and Mari for ways to keep me safe and comfortable at school. I wasn’t interested but they have to. I won’t mind it if it wasn’t during lunch break. Fucking hell, take me now satan. But on the bright side, everyone in Aqours threw me a party and tomorrow is the weekend. I’ve only been back for two days and I already wish the school year will end. When the party was over, Zuramaru and Ruby told me that their going to come over to my apartment tomorrow. 

I made my way home with You. You doesn’t live far from me so she decided to come over to my place and wait for my mom to come home. It’s a blessing and a curse to be an only child. We went straight to my room when we got to my apartment. 

“You got the goods?” 

“Of course I do maydee!” You got into her bag and took out custom made adult onesies and adult baby onesies. “Made to fit Ruby-chan and Hanamaru-chan perfectly. I figured since it’s made to fit what they like, I didn’t need to label which belongs to who. Like this bunny one is for Ruby and this tenoki is for Hanamaru-chan etc. That’s fine right?” 

“It’s perfect.” I paid You. “I’m a little surprised on how fast you made these, didn’t I just asked for these?” 

“After the first bunch, I quickly figured out how to quickly make them. I’m making good money from selling these online. You can still help me make my own website right?” 

“Yeah of course. So, what’s it like being with that mikan loving idiot?” You chuckled at that. 

“She’s such a cutie! Especially when I put her in her diaper! But she clings to me so much that I can’t go to the bathroom without her or she’ll start crying! Ugh I want my baby girl!” You got this dorky smile on her face. I grabbed a pillow and threw it at her head. 

“Lucky you got a little, Zuramaru and Ruby ain’t my littles yet. Well, I’m hoping for that yet. But I got them to sleep with a pacifier!” 

“Geez I hope you didn’t sound desperate. Well having custom onesies prepared for them does sound a little desperate.” 

“Oh shut up yousoro, I pay you for them so don’t even talk. I’m just hoping the diapers I have can fit them.” 

“I already told you the sizes that will fit them so you have nothing to worry about. Plus, Chika-chan loves that brand so you’ll be fine. And if it doesn’t, Chika-chan would want it in a heartbeat.” 

“Of course she would, didn’t you say that she used a whole pack of them in like a few days? No wonder you’re trying to make some money on the side, this shit is expensive.” 

“What can I say? She loves using diapers! I’m more surprised she was able to hide them from her family. At every opportunity she puts it on and sometimes she’s needed somewhere and has no time to change out of it.” 

You and I continued to talk and didn’t even notice my mom came home until she knocked at my door. After all that talk about littles, I really want Zuramaru and Ruby to be my littles. They would be the cutest things ever! I’m just hoping they would agree to this or at least try. 

I got up later in the morning, stayed up late watching porn. I got myself ready for the day and made my way to the kitchen. I saw my mom about to leave for work. 

“Oh good you’re up! I’m working late so the three of you will have to have dinner without me. I left some money so you can have whatever you want.” 

“Do you want me to leave you food?” My mom was rushing out the door. 

“No I’m ok sweetheart. Don’t forget to take your medicine. I love you!” 

“Love you too mom.” With that, she’s out the door. She knows my girlfriends will be over shortly so she’s ok with leaving me alone. I got out my pill bottle and crashed a pill. I mixed that in some juice and got a cup of dry cereal. Yes I eat my cereal dry, fight me. I hate milk. 

Not too long later, my girlfriends arrive. They seemed to be in a playful mood. Like they were energetic like children but not hyper. More as in they were in a really good mood. I’m not in a similar mood, quite the opposite really. I’m still trying to get used to a medication that’s supposed to help me but I’ve been getting worse taking it. On top of that, it’s hard to sleep and to wake up so I’m really tired. You can literally see the bags under my eyes from far away. 

But nonetheless, I smile a bit from their happy expressions. Then all the sudden they pull me into my room. 

“What’s with this?” I sat on my bed waiting to see what’s going to happen next. 

“Play with us mommy!” Ruby looked at me with her adorable emerald eyes. My eyes widen in shock. 

“Wait, what?” I was taken aback, I didn’t expect this. 

“We want to play baby with you, zura!” I was so happy to hear that I literally almost started crying. But I got to put on my dom face. This is my chance to show them that this is really fun! I got up from the bed and walked towards them. They looked up at me with their adorable eyes and excited smiles. I tickled their bellies and gave them a genuine smile. Not the one that convinces people you’re happy no, I was beyond thrilled. 

“Ok baby girls, on the bed. Let’s get you two into something more appropriate for your age. No more big girl clothes.” They sat down on the bed and waited for me. I got into my wardrobe and got the hidden packs of diapers as well as the changing supplies. I got a regular sized thick diaper and a smaller sized thick diaper. The diapers both had baby bottle and blocks prints them. I put the items on the bed and moved over to the two. Ruby was the closest to the items so I started with her. I laid her down on the bed and took off her big girl clothes. 

I spread her legs and cleaned her up before I put the smaller sized diaper under her. I powdered her up then closed the diaper. Ruby has a really small waist that the types were almost on top of each other but it fit like a glove. I moved over to Zurmaru who has already laid back waiting for me. She managed to get one of the pacifiers and is happily sucking on it. 

Zuramaru helped me a little while I took off her clothes. Once all the clothes were off, she gave me such an innocent expression that melts my heart. She smiles and giggles to me. I got the diaper under her bottom and cleaned her up. Once the powder was applied, I closed up the diaper. The two of them giggled in excitement and held their hands out towards me. 

I leaned in and gave them a kiss on their cheeks. I went into the dresser where the onesies were and I looked around for the perfect ones for them. I have a lot so it’s hard to pick. Once I made my decision, I went back to Ruby to dress her first. I got a pink baby onesie with a short lift pink fluffy skirt, ribbons for her pigtails, baby gloves and socks, and a white bib that has a pink outline. After I dressed her, I got one of the big pacifiers with a design on it, it was covered in small gems with a lollipop in the middle, and a pacifier clip. I attached the clip to the collar of the onesie and gave her the pacifier. 

“Cute, zura! Mommy made Ruby-chan cuter, zura!” Zuramaru clapped her hands. Ruby blushed but she looked extremely happy. 

“Maru-chan now!” I smiled at her. 

“I know baby.” I got over to Zuramaru. I picked out the adult onesie of a tenoki for her. I dressed her up and put the hood over her head. “Now both of my baby girls look adorable.” They giggled then I heard one of their tummies growling. 

“Baby hungry, zura!” Zuramaru sat up and Ruby did the same. 

“Would babies want chicken nuggets?” I didn’t want them to know I didn’t prepare baby food advice. Plus, my ass can’t cook by myself so nuggets will do for now. They nodded. “Alright, let's go to the living room and I’ll heat them up.” 

They got up but looked weird trying to walk in those thick diapers. Zuramaru got the hand of walking in the diaper but Ruby couldn’t keep up. She turned to me and grabbed my shirt. I took the hint to carry her. I’m starting to think Ruby is going to a clingy baby. 

With my baby girls playing together, I prepared their food and two bottles of milk. Once everything was ready, I took the food to the living room and placed the plates on the coffee table. Zuramaru tried to grab the food with her hands but I quickly stopped her. 

“They’re still hot, you don’t want an owie don’t you?” I grabbed a fork and fed her one. I went back and forth one feeding one nugget to one then to another. When all the food got eaten, I cleaned the dishes and walked my babies back to the room with their big baby bottles. 

I sat on my bed against the wall and I expected both girls to sit on my lap to be nursed. Instead, Zuramaru took her bottle and sat beside me while Ruby laid down on me. She cuddled up against me and waited for me to nurse her. I fixed our position so it would be comfortable for all of us. 

I started to nurse Ruby and patted her as I did. Not too long later Zuramaru finished her bottle. She looked at me and showed me her empty bottle. “Good job baby, you can leave the bottle on the bed, don’t worry about it.” She tugged on my sleeve in a way that made it seem like she really needs me. 

“What is it baby?” Ruby is drifting to sleep and she didn’t finish her bottle yet. She wasn’t drinking anymore so took the bottle away and put the pacifier in its place. I gently placed her down on the bed and placed a blanket on top of her. She was out like a light. 

“Maru needs to make a stinky and wants to mommy to hold Maru.” She was holding her stomach a little. 

“Oh! Come here baby girl! Use your diaper like a good baby for mommy!” She moved over and had her body facing me. I moved up a bit from the wall and let her hug me and get comfortable. Her arms wrapped around my neck with her head facing the wall and legs spread in a squat like position. I rubbed her diapered butt to let her know she can do her business. 

I noticed her being a little nervous but she is having a little difficulty nonetheless. I pat a little on her diaper area. “It’s ok baby girl, do it for mommy.” I hum a little song to help her calm down. Which was working, I felt around the diaper to feel that she’s wet but didn’t mess yet. She held onto me more, groaning a little. Then I hear her give a sigh in relief. 

I felt around the diaper and sure enough, she finished doing her business. She plopped down on her mess and tried getting friction on her princess parts. I quickly laid her down on the bed and got out a fresh diaper and got the supplies for the change. 

“I know you are excited but not right now, baby. Let’s get you out of this messy diaper and into a fresh one!” Lucky for me, the onesie was made with the intention to be worn with a diaper on. So I don’t need to take the whole thing off so I can change her. I quickly got her out of the diaper and into a new one. After her change was done, I look up to check on Ruby. 

She had tears in her eyes. Zuramaru crawled over to Ruby and cuddled up next to her to comfort her. I made my way over to her and tried to wipe her tears while trying to gently wake her up. She suddenly woke up and started crying out. She started crying out for me. 

“Shh, it’s ok baby girl. Mommy is right here.” I picked her up so she can hold on to me so she can calm down. “Shhh, shh, everything is ok. Mommy isn’t going anywhere.” I looked over at Zuramaru and she was starting to get upset. I moved over so I can comfort her too. Ruby clinged to me tightly and continued to cry. 

I rubbed Ruby’s back and used the other to rub Zuramaru‘s head. We like this for a little while until Ruby was only sniffling. “Do you want to talk about it to mommy?” Ruby nodded. She sat down in front of me and Zuramaru laid down next to her and held her hand. It looked like she knows what she’s going to say. 

“W-when Ruby was little… Bad man… touched…” She moved her hand to on top of her diaper. “...here…” She was getting upset again. I held her hand. “A-a-and tried to… put his… pee pee… inside…” I wiped the newly formed tears. “N-now Ruby gets nightmares from that.” 

“I’m so sorry, Ruby, baby girl. I had no idea. I’m proud of you and happy that you are able to trust me to tell me.” I gave her a kiss on her forehead. I got a little whiff of her diaper. “Can mommy check your diaper?” She eagerly nodded. I laid her down and undid the onesie. Just looking at it was enough to show she was really wet. 

“Look how wet you are! It’s so full! Let’s get you cleaned up and into a new diaper.” I got up. Zuramaru and Ruby played with each other while they wait for me to get up. I came back and saw Zuramaru giving Ruby lots of kisses. I tickled her just enough to get her to smile. 

I made sure Ruby was in a better mood before changing her diaper. I got her cleaned up and in a new diaper. “Does my baby girls want to take a nap? Or need anything?” 

“Maru want milk!” 

“Ok baby girl, do you want something, cutie?” I looked at Ruby. 

Ruby hesitated. “Nap.” 

“Ok, we’ll nap after I get Zuramaru her bottle ok? I’ll get gone for a few minutes.” I kissed her hand and made my way to the kitchen. I cleaned up the bottles they used previously and used one of them for Zuramaru’s new bottle. I returned to the bed and fixed our positions so Zuramaru and I can sleep next to Ruby so she can come to both of us for comfort. I laid out a blanket and covered on the two of them. 

I gave both of them a kiss on the forehead and gave Zuramaru her bottle. Ruby cuddled up next to me since Zuramaru was busy with her bottle. She sucked on her pacifier until she fell asleep again. Zuramaru did the same when she finished her bottle. 

I quietly whispered, “Good night baby girls, mommy loves you.”

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT 9/10/20:
> 
> I have an ABDL themed server for love live on discord, if you want to join and hang around here's the invite link:  
https://discord.gg/3stG2VT


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